Friday, June 02, 2006

Things Change

My wife and I have been married for ten months and have had quite the adventure in this first year of marriage. Many people joked about things changing after you get married and after the "honeymoon" fades away. I can testify that we have a wonderful marriage, and I am more in love with her today than I have ever been.
I do understand there are some things that pass away, die once a single man is married. I am thankful to God to be married and have her as my wife, but I note there is one thing that changed after Karen and I were married. One small, minor, and insignificant thing that I did not expect to pass away once we were married; I had plans that it should rather intensify.
When I lived as a bachelor, one of the fragrances I loved to grace my apartment, as did Mitchell my roommate, was Nag Champa. Nag Champa (Näg chumpa) is a flower in India that is used to make incense, soap, oils and such. Before Karen and I married, she enjoyed coming over to my apartment where she was welcomed by this smell that reminded her of me. I was thrilled that Karen was fond of incense and especially Nag Champa.
However, I was not ready for the abrupt end to my Nag Champa days. After we married and returned to Louisville, naturally, I wanted our house to be filled with the aroma of Nag Champa. After a short time, of Nag Champa in our house, I found out that since Karen and I were now together she didn't need Nag Champa to remind her of me. After all my apartment is now her apartment. She like coming over to my apartment and smell the burning stick, but then she went home to her own "clean" smell. She had no desire for her house to reek of Nag Champa or in her words "a Buddhist temple" or "an Indian Mosque".
I was flabbergasted and speechless. Needless to say, I don't light it in the house anymore.
But I do have Nag Champa in my office at church. I don't light it too much there because I'm sure of what the concensus is. I am delighted with the smell of unburnt incense in my office.
So where do I burn my favored smell? The Pontiac Grand Am has become my Nag Champa sanctuary (not in a Buddhist sense mind you). That's right I have retreated to my car and burn incense while in motion. I am my Father's son who has in the past had to retreat his Little Debbie's to his vehicle due to my mother's insistence that those foods should not be kept in her kitchen. It is all I know. When your wife says, "Not in the house," then it's to the car.
I'm not saying that this is the best arrangement in Karen's eyes, but she gives me this indulgence. I love my wife, and I love our exciting marriage. I can say for her, she does not love my smells except after a long shower.